Monday 14th November 2011
Over the weekend we had an unscheduled child free night. It was great, always enjoy those little luxuries. Not that I don’t love my kids and love having them around and being a family, it’s just nice to have a little break.
Well, hubby decided to make the most of the child free Saturday night. It was time to go through my book. Well half an hour later and a session with the cane and paddle, it was over with. Not so bad as I hadn’t been such a bad girl this last week, exercise notwithstanding. (Seems I have a major issue with exercise and not getting it done regardless of the consequences – he is going to have to be more imaginative methinks).
Anyway, when it was all over and done with I decided it was time for a talk. Things need changing a little. This two week accountability isn’t working so well for me. I’ve been pondering my words and approach for the last couple of weeks. I gathered all my courage, and I asked him if we could maybe talk a little about DD and make some changes.
He asked me what I had in mind.
Well, mainly that the two week thing wasn’t working, it’s OK for some stuff, weight-loss, exercise. But I feel that I need more immediate consequences.
“OK” he said “You mean, when you do something wrong you want me to take you into the bedroom and spank you straight away”
“Well, I guess that pretty well sums it up babe, yes, but also I need more scolding, you don’t really talk enough about what it is I have done wrong”
“What about the kids. When you do something wrong it always seems like it’s in the middle of the day and the kids are about”
Oh! OK! I hadn’t realized this.
We then agreed that when I do something he considers a spankable offence, if privacy permits he will spank me there and then but if privacy is an issue we will wait until the next opportunity, whether it is later that evening or the next day. BUT I have to remind him if it looks like he has forgotten. I’m not so sure about that little technicality!
Then he warned me to watch out because now that he is allowed to spank me whenever he wants to he will.
Baby if only you had realized you have always been “allowed” to spank me “anytime”.
WOW, what can I say? Since this little talk he has gotten sterner with me in the tone of his voice when asking things, and giving his little directions. He is stricter too, issuing warnings left right and centre and just reminding me that I have told him I want immediate consequences. I have done my best to heed the warnings and done as I was told so far – so hence I have not had a punishment spanking yet (my bad girl angel is a little indisposed right now *evil chuckle* - yup she is out of the picture – not sure how long, slippery little bugger that she is she will be back I know.
I guess he just didn’t realize where the line was and therefore he was too cautious not to cross it.
But now I feel kind of nervous. Not knowing what to expect. I know the rules of course, but I have found in the past that I tend to get into trouble when I least expect it… It’s great that he is stepping up and I feel very proud of him for stepping up. He is an amazing man and I love him with my whole heart. But, yeah, I have those nervous butterflies, just lightly fluttering a little. It’s certainly going to keep me on my toes – which can only be a good thing.
Well Kiwi it's that saying to "make sure you know what you want because you just might get it". Sounds like you are going to be getting it alright.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like it could really work. I have a feeling you had better behave yourself or it may be a question of being careful of what you ask for.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
pk
Interesting post, things are always more complex then you might think.
ReplyDeleteWhat is it with exercise? melinda seems unable to meet even the easiest goals. And it seems to get you in frequent trouble as well...
Seems you will be getting what you wished for:) I hope it all works out well for you.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Ronnie
xx
Sounds...... Ominous lol!! But well, this way is surely going to work more effectively for you? Keep talking :)
ReplyDeleteDee x
This is great Kiwi! It sounds like he heard you on the "as soon as possible" issue. I am always amazed by how many times I need to say something using different words and all of a sudden he gets it. Makes me laugh. I hope this continues to work...just remember to not put too much pressure on you or him to get it all right too quickly.
ReplyDeleteAmazing what open communication can do for a realtionship! Good for you! Sara
ReplyDeleteSUNNYGIRL: LOL well lets see, we talked, he heard, lets see if he does :) fingers crossed.
ReplyDeletePK: I hope you are right, thank you xx
ELDER:thank you. I have no idea about the exercise mental block - for me all i know is that i hate it ...something to work on.
RONNIE: Thank you, i hope so too, looks promising.
DEE: Yes it does, LOL, like i said im nervous now. I will be on my best behaviour thats for sure. Im not sure what has changed but i think its because it doesnt feel like a game anymore - which is great.
SUSIE: Yeah, i think he did, hope it works - let's see :)
SARA; Isnt it? LOL - thank you :D xx
Great that you two seem to be on the same page now...though your hiney may not always think so! lol
ReplyDeleteHeehee, give it a month or two, you may well be wishing you had never had this little "talk", *giggles* but, seriously, bet you will secretly be so turned on by it all! xxxxxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteHi Grace, yes finally on teh same page :) lets hope it lasts. But i tell you something, since we had this talk ive got that nervous feeling in my stomach constantly - its got me on my toes i can tell you.
ReplyDeleteDAISYCHAIN: well, i freely admit i was always a spanko LOL..it always turns me on no matter - but i just prefer the DD side of things to playful spankings - i like the structure and the rules - still turns me on though LOL...
still wondering why you think the one has to exclude the other?
ReplyDeleteWow, Kiwi, I really admire your ability to communicate to him what you want and need with ttwd!
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you're going to get what you wished for ;-)
Very good job, Kiwi! It took courage to tell him that, and I think you are getting the "reward" for doing what you should do.
ReplyDeleteSG: :P hehe we have talked about that xxx
ReplyDeleteSTUMBLINGCHI: Thank you - talking isnt always the easiest thing - and i so hope im going to get what i want :) xxx
RICHPERSON: thank you xxx
Sometimes I like the butterflies. ;-) Glad things are going well for you both.
ReplyDelete