Monday 7th November 2011
MY CRIME - was a full two weeks of of misbehaviour, cheek, sass, disrespect, disobedience an dishonesty, broken rules, tantrums and tears and it looked something like this
14 days of no exercise (2 weeks worth);
One rather large temper tantrum because of no water;
Disobedience – doing something I was explicitly told not to do which could have dire consequences not just for me and my behind but for us as a family;
Disrespect – accusing Sir of something rather horrible and completely untrue and unfounded;
Dishonesty – doing something without his permission.
Not doing my chores on time or at all.
MY PUNISHMENT - well it seemed to never happen. I did begin to think it was never coming despite words to the contrary.
Thursday morning I got a taste of what was to come in the bathroom with the cords – ouch
But still I waited and waited. I hate waiting. The more I wait the worse it gets in my head. I get so nervous and wound up. I start to feel let down, disappointed, neglected, uncared for.
Friday night came and I was told no punishment tonight but he thought Saturday morning would be a good idea – because we were going horse riding – so he figured that going horse riding with a very sore bottom would be good for me.
"That’s not fair, I love my horse riding".
"But that’s the point" – to teach me a lesson.
Saturday morning came, he read my accountability book and over his knee I went – a first for a while.
He rubbed and stroked my back and my bottom to start with. Talking all the while about what I had done all week. I got a few smacks with his hand – ouch I forgot his hand could hurt quite so.
Then I was made to lie on my tummy on the bed and out came the paddle and the cane. Still talking and telling me off for my behaviour and actions. Red bottom, tears and apologies and comforting later it was over forgiven and forgotten.
Sunday came and we had a lovely lazy Sunday morning making love. Oh then I was told not to move, to roll over on to my tummy and time to remind me to behave and have a little less sass and lip thank you very much.
A few more strokes of the belt, paddle and cane and a very sore and red bottom; tears and comfort later and we were done for the day.
SO I start my new week with a clean new slate, all shiny and bright and to start it off really well I did my exercises this morning – way to go me. And I did all my chores on time. And I got that good girl that I so love to hear. It made my heart swell this morning.
I hope I can keep it up.
What a difference a little proper discipline makes! This sounds a lot more like what you wanted out of the whole thing. I hope it builds on this.
ReplyDeleteIsn't starting with a clean slate nice? Keep up the good work! I know the exercise thing gets to be a real pain and it's easy to think, oh I'll just wait and do it Thurs, Fri, Sat. But it's so nice to get it out of the way at the beginning of the week. Hope the week continues to go well for you.
ReplyDeleteI think you got what you needed and wanted. I hope the up coming week is a good one for both of you.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
PK
You can keep it up! I know that when I've been struggling with stuff and I can pull it together for a while and do the right things, the positive attention is really great. Keep working hard and have a great week!
ReplyDeleteGood work! Try hard to keep that slate clean.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Hermione
Kiwi, clearly this every 2 week thing is not working for you. Look how good you feel now, and no matter what happens, it will take another 2 weeks to deal with any issues that arise? It's no wonder you go on a downward spiral. Can you explain this to him? It has to be about what works for you...if it IS going to work! Sara
ReplyDeleteI like that "start the week with a clean slate" I hope it's a good week for you.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Ronnie
xx
Look what positive reinforcement can do eh :) but I also think you need to review how you both work things, I know you're trying :) Says me who STILL hasn't given up the link yet lol! (sigh!)
ReplyDeleteDee x
Kiwi, So glad you're feeling better, try not to be too hard on yourself the next two weeks.
ReplyDeleteI get a perk in my step and get things done quite well after Henry corrects me, and *showing* the upside *for him* has really helped us both along quite nicely. I've been there with the waiting, and it's very difficult on me emotionally too. I think it's good to tell him about those feelings that you describe here (maybe he reads here?) like how you feel uncared for. I can totally relate to that, as it's how I felt this past week when I had to wait due to circumstances. I did that spiral too (and have done a number of times), and it feels just awful. But knowing that he understands helps some, and he still takes care of the issue. It does seem to help with future interactions though when I how I struggle (very, very respectfully of course ;-) )with his time frame.
ReplyDeleteIt's so nice to read such happy news, like your Sunday reconnect! -Elysia
A clean slate, a new week, you can do it Kiwi.
ReplyDeleteYayyyyyyyyyyy! At last! Let's hope the memory of it all will help you keep on track this week! xxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteRICHPERSON: Thank you. I so agree :)
ReplyDeleteLEA: OH yes it is nice - thanks. Ill try.
PK: I did - i feel back on track - thank you :)
SUSIE: I hope so and thanks :)
HERMIONE: thank you, yes I will.
SARA: I agree with you the two week thing doesn work i need immediate (or close to) accountability. I need to talk to him but find it so hard because he shuts me down. I think he feels comfortable with what we do now and doesnt want to change it. I dont want to sound like im nagging or complaining, i need to find that balance. Il try.
RONNIE: Thank you - me too :)
DEE: Oh yes absolutely.
FAERIE: tHANKS. Ill try not to.
ELYSIA: no he doesnt read it - in fact he knows nothing about it - yes another one! But thanks. It was a good weekend - still some tweaking to do.
JOEYRED51: I hope so :) thanks.
DAISYCHAIN: LOL yes too true! Thank you :) x
So glad you're feeling better:)!
ReplyDeleteLove,
Kitty
P.S. I agree with Sara! You really need to talk to your hubby and explain that you need more immediate accountability:)!
Hey gurl I'm proud of you!! I echo what Sara says though. And Dee.
ReplyDelete*hugs*
Hey Sweetgirl - thank you :) yes i agree - taking little steps though
ReplyDeletexxx